Man Trains Pigs

In Taipei, Taiwan, a farmer brang home 12 wild pigs, and trained them to follow his motor scooter. These pets are can also know the “rules of the road” and can even stop at stoplights.

Many time, these wild pigs have been spotted trotting behind a motor scooter, and recently the Taiwan’s Liberty Times newspaper photographed it.

For the original article gog to this website:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20090401/od_nm/us_pigs;_ylt=AqctzT3yr.fExK6CR03rd__tiBIF

How Blue Whales Came To Be

In a land not far from the evil Fluffles’ lair, there was a huge neighborhood where a peanut butter dog and a kiwi cat lived as neighbors.  The peanut butter dog’s house was made entirely of peanut butter, and the kiwi cat’s house was made entirely of kiwi.

Every day, peanut butter dog would eat his whole house, while kiwi cat only nibbled about 1/3 of her house. One day, peanut butter dog ate his whole house, and was still hungry, so he went on a search for food.  Meanwhile, the kiwi cat was watching an ad for kiwi planet for cats, and she started to pack her bags.  Peanut butter dog had just snuck up to kiwi cat’s house and took a bite when kiwi cat stepped out the front door.  Peanut butter dog then exploded!  Kiwi cat, having nowhere to go, started on her way to kiwi planet, which by the way is right next to Mars.  When she arrived at the planet she saw other kiwi cats, and started to gorge herself.  What she didn’t know was the one factor that moves this whole story’s plot line on!  Kiwi cat got to the last little bit, and ate it whole, but it was peanut butter!  She commenced to explode into a big blob of guts.  Out of that blob came a giant dog that shark as it his earth.  The small dog was found by Bell Taco, founder of Taco Bell, and made into the slogan dog.  He only ate at Taco Bell for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.  Break fast was usually salad, lunch was always nachos, and dinner was a strict diet of tacos.  One day, they had run out of salad, so he ate some nachos for breakfast.  When he got back, they ran out of nachos, so he had tacos for lunch.  When it came to be dinner time, they had run out of tacos, and deciding not to mess up his diet anymore, he went to pizza hut.  He ordered an ultra large pizza, and had to rent a lot of 600 by 600.5 square feet to set it down.  As he swam to the center of the pizza on a pepperoni, he noticed an olive alligator chasing him.  He paddled as fast as he could to get to the pineapple in the center.  He stepped onto it and then the olive alligator ate him up whole, and grew to the size of Godzilla!  When he started to tear up the city, and all hope was lost, the real Godzilla cam and the two fought and fought.  They ended up both dead in the ocean on top of the blue fish.  Now the blue fish’s brother was a magician, and he promised all the fish that helped to save his brother to turn them into blue whales!  So they lifted the olive off of the fish and they got their wish!  And that’s how blue whale came to be.

How Starfish Came to be and Why they are Star-shaped

***Please not that this is NOT a true story, the following story is for entertainment purposes only.***

Elvis was taking his normal drive through the toxic jungle of Antarctica. He was late for his concert and was rushing in his car as he dodged polar bears, snow monkeys, and igloos. All of a sudden, a huge sonic boom sent Elvis and his car skidding into a three foot ditch. Elvis looked around the gloomy, dark ditch. His head caught up with him and he realized that he hadn’t eaten for way too long. A fried peanut-butter and banana sandwich sounded really good to him right now. As if by magic, a giant sandwich floated by his car window. He darted out to greet it, but it rose an inch out of the grasp of his stubby fingers. Suddenly, the sandwich grew into a face, and Elvis grimaced. Then one by one, a human-like form started to appear. First, arms appeared, covered in peanut butter, then legs looking like bananas. The sandwich started to look like human arms and legs.

“Who be you?” a voice boomed out like a jet taking off.

“Oh my gosh!” Elvis yelled, “It’s the evil clone of pop sensation Britney Spears, Yentirb Sraeps!”

“Yes, it is I, evil clone of the pop sensation, Britney Spears”

“What are you doing here?” gasped Elvis.

“Getting rid of you, what else?” screeched Yentirb in a deathly high-pitched tone that caused Elvis’s car windows to smash.

“What…but…why?” squeaked Elvis nervously.

“Well, Britney and I, Yentirb Sraeps, evil clone of the pop sensation Britney Spears, have noticed that you have been stealing a lot of our money with your songs and albums being better then Britney’s! With you gone we wukk accept our greedy attitude and take all the money! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”

“You’ll never get away with it!” Elvis screeched, straining his vocal chords.

“Just watch me,” she replied. “Oh, wait, that’s right, you be GONE!” HAHAHAHA!” Suddenly, Yentirb snapped and three sparkling images flew down around her head. They sparkled all different colors. “Take care of him,” she instructed them. Then, the sparkling figures flew up close to him and inspected his face. Elvis stared at the delicate creatures looking intently at him. Their heads were the size of his thumb.

“We have to destroy this guy?” The blue one said. “He smells weird.” She turned to look and Yentirb, but she had left.

“I do not!” Elvis yelled back. “What are you guys anyway?” he questioned.

“We are Sprites, of course!” The blue sprite said, in sing-song tone.

The red sprite approached Elvis and said, “Listen, we would rather be playing games of zero-gravity basket-weaving instead of destroying you, so I’ll make you a deal. Just be quiet, and we will buy you a Mercury burger on the way to the Destruction Zone on Mars.”

“Well, what if I don’t agree to your terms?” Elvis questioned with a smug on his face. His question was answered by the grayish-black sprite.

“You don’t want to know!” he snarled. Elvis’s smug instantly disappeared

For a few hours the sprites and Elvis rode until they reached Mercury Burgers, on Mars. After the burger and the sub-zero shake, they rode next door to the Destruction Zone that said, “Send a human to space the easy way for sprite slaves of evil clones of singing pop sensations”. The sprites then stuck Elvis in a tiny tube, and all three of the sprites argued about which button to push over on the control panel.

“I think it’s the big red one that says, ’shoot to sun’,” the red sprite stated.

“Actually-” coughed Elvis. “I think that the button that would cause me the most damage would be ‘turn into a star’ .”

The sprites all agreed and pushed the button. Elvis whirled around violently. All of a sudden he looked at himself and realized that he was a star, literally.

“You okay?” the blue sprite asked.

“Need…water!” Elvis, now a star, gasped.

The sprites then used their spritely magic and multiplied Elvis, making more stars, and sent them flying into the ocean back on Earth. Scientists, a few years later, found the stars, and decided to call them starfish!

The Classier Lava Lamp

After a stressful day, one thing appeals to most people.  It doesn’t matter if they are teenagers or working adults, they couldn’t survive without it.  It’s their bed.  Don’t let stress take over your time for rest.  Sleep is key for alertness and completing everyday tasks.  Without it, the brain would not be able to function at the best of its ability.  So why lose sleep over stress?  RelaxStyle presents the Room Palette effect lamp.  This new lamp projects on walls and ceilings in your bedroom.  It creates a waving effect which simulates being underwater.  This calming lamp is soothing and may help you fall asleep faster after a hard day.

Specs:

• Timer function:  Keep your lamp on for 30 minutes up to 120.
• Uses AA Batteries
• Light Source:  LED

 

Price:  $69

Marvel Preview: Spider-Man

Before Marvel Comics releases its newest production, “Iron Man”, I am going to write about a Marvel character every week until the week it hits theaters. Look out for an “Iron Man Edition” the week of its release. This week, we will be taking a look at the Amazing Spider-Man. Spider-Man is usually the first thing that comes to people’s minds when Marvel is mentioned. One of the most unique characters, both super powers and character, it makes Spider-Man realistic. DC Comics’ Superman is one of the most well-known superheroes around, but he lacks realism and “human character”. After all, he is from a different planet. But for those of you who are not familiar with Spider-Man or his interesting story, read on. If you do, you should read on as well.

Peter Parker is a geeky teenager who lives with his Aunt May and Uncle Ben in Queens, NY. His parents died in a plane crash when he was an infant. On a field trip to a laboratory, Peter is bitten by a radioactive spider. He goes home and sleeps and has superpowers the next day. He uses these powers to defend himself from Flash Thompson when he is threatened by him at school. It isn’t until tragedy strikes at home, does Peter realize that he must use powers to help the people of New York. “With great power comes great responsibility.”
SPIDER-MAN
Your friendly neighborhood web-slinger
SPIDER-MAN FACT FILE

Real Name: Peter Benjamin Parker
Occupation: Freelance photographer, science teacher
Base: New York City
Height: 5 ft 10 in

Weight: 170 lbs

Eyes: Hazel

Hair: Brown
First Appearance: Amazing Fantasy #15 (August 1962)
POWERS

Possesses the proportionate strength, speed, agility, and reflexes of a spider. Can cling to any surface and generate organic webbing. Also possesses a “spider-sense” that warns him of danger and can psychically align him with his environment. Invented spider-tracers that he can track across the city with his spider-sense.
ALLIES/FOES
ALLIES Ben and May Parker, Mary Jane Parker, Captain America, The Avengers, the Fantastic Four, the X-Men, Eugene “Flash” Thompson, Betty Brant Leeds.

FOES Chameleon, Vulture, Doctor Octopus, Sandman, Kingpin, Green Goblin, Lizard, Electro, Kraven the Hunter, Black Cat, Venom, Mysterio, Carnage, Scrier, Judas Traveller.
ISSUE #1

While attending a scientific demonstration, Peter Parker was bitten by a spider that had been exposed to radioactivity. Feeling nauseous, the teenager immediately headed home and began to exhibit the most amazing powers…like the ability to stick to walls and crawl up sheer surfaces!

ESSENTIAL STORYLINES

• Amazing Spider-Man #31-33: Spider-Man battles the Master Planner in order to obtain a rare serum that can save Aunt May’s life.
• Amazing Spider-Man: Fearful Symmetry or Kraven’s Last Hunt: Kraven the Hunter kidnaps Spider-Man and takes his place in a battle against the deadly Vermin.
• Amazing Spider-Man: The Saga of the Alien Costume: Spider-Man learns that his new black costume is actually an alien symbiote.
• Amazing Spider-Man vs. Venom: Spider-Man meets his match when Venom enters his life.
• Amazing Spider-Man: Identity Crisis: When a $5 million bounty is placed on his head for a murder he didn’t commit, Spider-Man must adopt four new costumed identities to find the real murderer.
• Amazing Spider-Man: Coming Home: Spider-Man meets the man called Ezekiel and learns there may be a lot more to his origin than he ever realized.

Nonsense Sentences

Here is a list of 10 sentences that either don’t make sense, make you think about, or just plain odd! Try to think about these sentences to see what you think about them!

1) If you don’t get this message, please call back.

2) Raise you hand if you’re not here!

3) Nobody goes to that restaurant, it’s too crowded.

4) Don’t ever go in water until you can swim.

5) Don’t drown yourself in the Fountain of Youth.

6) Half of my family lives here, half of my family lives there, and the other half lives even farther away!

7) Stop reading that picture book.

If you stay in the Fountain of Youth too long, you’ll get too old!

9) Stop thinking, it hurts your brain.

10) Two wholes make a half.

Exclusive Interview with Mrs. Stegner

1. What is something you are looking forward to?

Baby in April

2. What is your favorite color?

My favorite color is purple

3. What sports do you like?

Field Hockey

4. Is there something people do not know about you?

She was the teacher of the year 2 years ago.

5. How many years have you been teaching at Wakefield Middle School?

Five Years

6. If you weren’t a teacher what other job would you want?

Nurse

7. What is you favorite Song?

“Amazed” by Lone-star

8. Where did you live when you were growing up?

Marathon, New York and Buffalo, New York

9. Do you have a favorite sport team?

No favorite sport team.

10. Have you taught at any other schools other then Wakefield Middle School?

One other school

11. Do you have a hobby?

Yes, knitting, walking, and hanging with family.

12. What is a goal you have for this year?

Educate to become a great mom.

13. Do you have a favorite restaurant?

Lostres Maguyes

14. What is your favorite season?

Fall

15. Do you have a favorite movie?

Monalisa Smile

16. IS there a place you want to vist?

Italy

17. What is your favorite thing to do at school?

Teach

18. What collage did you go to?

Niagara University, NY under grad and Capella University, NY grad

19. Is there a place you enjoy to go?

Home

20. What teacher should we interview next?

Mrs. LaFayette

“I Am Legend” Makes Box-Office History

Perhaps one of the most anxiously awaited movies hit theaters on December 14. I Am Legend, based on the novel written by Richard Matheson, has been produced for the third time. The previews showing clips of this movie was not revealing like Spider-Man 3 but it did not show much. However, it was enough for movie-goers to sit on the edge of their seat. Anxiety filled the air on the day of its release and many shows were sold out throughout the country. In the first weekend alone, Legend grossed a record-breaking $76.5 million. Passing “The Chronicles of Narnia”, “King Kong”, and “The Lord of the Rings” trilogy, I Am Legend had become the biggest December opening in history. Also, Legend earned more money than the following four movies combined!

The movie begins with a news interview Dr. Kripper (Emma Thompson) who is speaking about a scientific breakthrough that she and a team of scientists have achieved. She has taken the Measles virus and genetically altered it so that it only attacks cancerous cells. The treatment has proven to be 100% effective on 10,109 clinical trials. The news anchor asks, “So you have actually cured cancer?”. “Yes. Yes, we have,” claims Dr. Kripper. But the next scene proves her statement wrong as we go back in present day, which is three years after the interview. We learn that a virus known as KV (Kripper Virus), had a kill rate of 90%. Over 9% were infected but did not die. Less than 1% remained completely immune to the virus, but were hunted and killed. Now, there remains only one immune human on Earth…
Lt. Col. Robert Neville is a brilliant virologist who just happens to be the last human on Earth. Alone for three years, his people skills are obviously rusty and he shows it during the film. However, Neville has a companion: “Man’s Best Friend” (ironic, huh), Sam. Sam is a three-year-old German Shepherd who was once belonged to Neville’s daughter, Marley. During the day, Neville and Sam gather food, exercise, and hunt. Also, he spends time in his laboratory in the basement of his home, in which he attempts to develop an anti-virus for KV. But at night, his objective is to survive as nocturnal “vampire-zombies” (a.k.a. “dark seekers”) roam the city, hungry for whoever is still alive.

“My name is Robert Neville. I am a survivor living in New York City. I am broadcasting on all AM frequencies. I will be at the South Street Seaport everyday at mid-day, when the sun is highest in the sky. If you are out there… if anyone is out there… I can provide food, I can provide shelter, I can provide security. If there’s anybody out there… anybody… please. You are not alone.”

I Am Legend has the best special effects that I have ever seen! When picturing a mental image of Manhattan, you see traffic, crowds of people, tourists, and lights. In Legend, you see none of this. You see abandoned cars that are rusting, weeds growing through concrete streets, weathered signs, an occasional deer, a demolished Brooklyn Bridge, and so much that you wouldn’t see unless the world is ending. One scene of the movie cost $5 million to produce, the most expensive scene to date in New York City.
I Am Legend is a science fiction movie but has a wide range of thematic elements. It was very touching, seeing the bond that Neville had with his dog. It was sad and depressing when seeing flashbacks of what happened when the virus spread. It made some people giggle at some of the jokes that Will Smith cracked at multiple times in the movie. But most of all, Legend will keep you at the edge of your seat and with your hands cupped over your ears. When you know something bad is going to happen…BOOM!…it happens and you still jump out of your seat.
After viewing this movie, it made me raise some questions.

• What did Neville do as the infected stayed trapped in Manhattan?
• Flashbacks leave big gaps. Why so? (One minute we’re finding out there is a cure for cancer, the next we find out how the infected are quarantined)
• Why can’t the “dark seekers” find Neville while they roam the city at night?

Overall, I thought I Am Legend was an excellent movie. It had the thematic elements that viewers are looking for, the special effects that keep getting better but it lacks answering the simple questions that viewers have. Will Smith had one of his best performances ever and played his character very well. Legend is definitely worth watching again so look out for it on DVD.

For questions, comments, storyline information, or to submit your rating, contact me at sean@whatsupwakefield.com.

MY RATING: A-

The Real Story of How Pink Poodles Came to Be

It was a very sunny afternoon when Tom the fish was on his Sunday walk through the reef.  All the clams were chirping merrily as he passed, and the fountain bubbled constantly.  He was about to go home when all of a sudden, the sun was blocked out all around him. Sweat arose from his brow as he slowly looked upward to meet eyes with a deadly predator. Read more

Chatting With Chad

Confused’s Question: “How do you tell if a guy is in to you?”

Chad’s Answer: Try smiling at him. if he smiles back, he might be in to you. If he smiled at you, ask him out. if he says no, start crying. He might go out with you then.-Chad

Cabbage Hater asks: “How do you feel about cabbage?”

Chad’s Response: I hate cabbage. It makes me puke. Read Taste of Tabor to learn more about cabbage.

Unlucky Luke: “I have a big test today. Should I study for it?”

Chad: Stop asking questions and go study.

Spideyman5 asks: “I didn’t make the sports team. What should I do?”

Chad: You should play on a recreational/community team. You are almost guaranteed to play.”

Chalk Hater: How come teachers don’t got no chalk board these days?”-I Ain’t Got No Grammer

Chad’s Chalky Response: I like chalk. White boards are replacing chalkboards these days. It’s not good.

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